With a pun. I won’t type the word “punny” because it’s awful. Oops, too late.
For quite some time now, I’ve been doing the Friday Chicken over at Havi’s blog. And for possibly just about as long, I’ve been wondering how/whether/when to migrate the practice (or a similar one) over here.
Because it’s seriously powerful (every week I realize I’ve done so much more than I thought I had, and usually some spontaneous compassion comes up), and I’d like to share it with you here. But…well my monsters have objections.
What finally convinced me is that I came up with a word, or really a phrase, that tickled my mind so much I couldn’t wait to use it.
But I’m still feeling really weird about it, so I’m going to try an experiment – write out my Chicken-that’s-now-secretly-a-weekly over on Havi’s blog, then smuggle it out in the dead of night and post it here.
We’ll see how it goes. Experimenting!
So here is my week. My weekly
- Not sleeping. And then not sleeping. And then sleeping even less. Insomnia + baby nursing every hour + more insomnia. Everything I did this week was like wading through a fog.
- Stupid bear time.
- And not getting to do the Most Important Part of bear time, which is not seeing anyone.
- Actually, bear time aside, insomnia aside, I spent SO MUCH time socializing this week. It would have been too much no matter what. And I complained the whole time, but complaining didn’t lead to socializing any less. I need some time to do some processing on that.
- Also not really eating. Usually my first response to anything is to eat more. (And when people say things like “I was too busy/stressed to eat” I shoot daggers at them with my eyes.) But seriously? I’m too busy and stressed to eat. This isn’t good.
- (Normal) post-pregnancy hair loss means there is hair EVERYWHERE. I spend a lot of time unwinding it from various parts of the baby.
- Our nanny cancelled. Again. So no date with my husband this week. No massage. I’m too heartbroken to be heartbroken over this.
- My work hours got split up over three days and that wasn’t good. And the SUPER EXCITING PROGRESS with work and writing also brought up a lot of stuff.
- Trying to figure out a way to feed the wee little where my boobs are not directly involved. And wow. Talk about a transition filled with a lot of stuff, both mine and other people’s. Also complicated.
(No I’m not weaning a three month old baby, nor am I feeding her formula. Just trying to get her to take expressed milk in a bottle/cup/oral syringe/something. I also definitely don’t want advice on it.)
- That one heartbreak, the one from – oh – late October? It’s acting up again.
- Realized that how much I miss my friends from college is affecting everything else. Negatively. So yay for the information but wow. Even though it’s been years since we were in the same city, it hurts every day that they aren’t here. Every day. (Why can’t everyone I like move to Portland? Stupid New York. Stupid Idaho.)
- The Bloggess followed me on Twitter. -swoon- Me and, you know, almost 20,000 other people. But I am one of those almost 20,000 people!!
- Also, Twitter was amazing this week. I love Twitter.
- I got so much written (including 2,000 words on my new thing)! And so much clarity about what was holding back my writing! And also a lot of clarity about my website!
- Was able to turn an experience I interpreted as being called a cliche into some very useful information about me. Still hurts, but not as much.
- Sweet Scarlet is three months old. And has started giggling madly at the least provocation. I also could swear she’s trying to sing sometimes. Best. Baby. Ever.
- I got to have dinner with Andy! He is interesting and kind and very fun to talk to! Which I guess I already knew since those are all the reasons I talk to him online too, but meeting him in real life was super special.
- Got to hang out in person with not only Andy, but also a few other people who really like me and get what I’m trying to do and…basically think I’m brilliant. Since most the people I talk to off the internet are like “what do you do again?” or “have you made some tangible progress yet?” or “what do you mean, internet business?” it’s nice when people get it. And, you know, believe in me.
- The room in The Purple House where I’m going to teach is starting to come together. Both in the real world and in my mind. I can see it!
- Starting my website design class. May it teach me all the things I need to know! Like the list of updates to this site I’ve been meaning to make forever.
- I have some of the best Facebook friends ever. Looking specifically at Claire, Asa, and Simone, among others. (Really they’re online friends and I’ve met Simone in person. But they were helpful on Facebook this week.)
For next week I’d like the superpower of sleep.
One of the important things about this is that it’s not shared in order to get advice or fixing. I’m receptive to people lighting candles for the hard or sending imaginary warm blankets and tea.
You may also, as always, use this space to do some processing about your stuff.
Love love love.